Voting

Oct 18, 2006

Breakdown and back UP again

Well I recently read that Melissa had her Great Meltdown of 2006 but she didn't let us know the details. Well I recently had my second breakdown of the year. I am only sharing this so Mel knows that we all have them and it is normal, I think! Well my first one was several months ago in August after having a family dinner for my birthday with my dad's side of the family. Nothing happened out of the ordinary but I just lost it on the way home. Who knows why? My parents have been divorced for about 7 1/2 years now but about once a year I have a major breakdown over this. I was feeling like my life wasn't fair and that I was being mistreated. I got really mad about some things but I am over it now. It usually takes me a few days and then it passes until the next year.

Now for my second one, this is on a totally different subject but just a painful. I also have one of these about 1-2 times a year. I was feeling down and out because I feel very overweight and I feel like it is hopeless for me to even try to lose any because I have so much to lose. I am like all the rest of our family and I have the need for instant results. Most of the time I am ok with how I look. I don't think about it much really. I guess I just save it up for one big breakdown. I was feeling like why did I get picked to be the fat one in the family and really distructive things like that but I am over that now too. I would like to lose weight but I know that won't make me a better person. I guess it just all caught up with me. I have been stressed lately with work and school and the boys and house work that seems to never stay caught up. I sometimes feel like there is not enough time in the day to get it all done. Well there it is in a nutshell.

Just my yearly Breakdowns. I had them and now it is time to get on with my LIFE!!!!

4 comments:

Michael said...

My parents got divorced about 20 years ago, and I still get messed up over that from time to time. I think it's perfectly normal.

Melissa said...

i'm so sorry windy! i feel ya girl. it's hard wearing all the many hats we have. i'll try to post the details of mine soon, but just know that you have to take it one day at a time. i think you're right, it is perfectly normal to have those overwelming days. i'll leave you with a quote by Graham Cooke that helped me during my meltdown.
"God calls us to do the impossible and see the invisible. He doesn't call us to do the things we can do, but to do the things that we'll never be able to do in a million years. Only He can do it. We can't find security in what God is doing, there is only security in who God is!"
I hope this helps you as it has helped me. I have it on my heart to give this CD of Graham Cooke speaking to a lot of my friends and family. It is awesome! I love ya!

Caci said...

why is it that I am having to read about these meltdowns on blog entries and no one has called me to talk to me about them?????????????????
what is up with that???????
ok, so now that I have vented, I am glad that you are both over your meltdowns and back to living life again. I am sure I have had about 3 meltdowns this year already (if not more!), and I definitely cry my share of tears almost DAILY! Lissa, those words are very much what I needed to hear at this point in my life!
Oh, and you both know the struggles I go through because of my family! thanks for always listening!

Patti said...

And I am sorry, too, that my actions sometimes cause you to be sad or cry or be anything except happy. I know you will agree that it is very difficult for a mother to do things that she knows will be hurtful to her children; even harder to do things that leave lasting scars that will never completely go away. All I know, is that the decisions I made were extremely difficult to make, but were the best I could make at the time. My thoughts included how you would be affected and I agonized over the pain and devastation that my actions were going to cause you. I too have an occasional meltdown over the suffering I have caused my children. I am truly sorry, Windy. I love you with all my heart!